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FATHER, SON, AND MOTHER NATURE 

You conceived me by having a cosmic orgasm.
I was born with someone else's hair color.
You bought me a crib, clothes, and diapers.
I kept you up for the next two weeks.
You brought me to church to have me baptized.
I defecated in your hands and spit on your shirt.

You showed me how to put on my socks and tie my shoes.
I clogged up the toilet for at least a week with my toys.
You introduced me to liver, cabbage, and baked potatoes.
I ask you in front of everyone what a "cunt" was.
You told me never to talk to strangers.
I called you an asshole and ran away from home.

You taught me how to drive a car.
I got drunk and smashed your corvette into a tree.
You influenced me never to smoke cigarettes.
I got addicted to cocaine and LSD.
You asked me to use a rubber and not get anyone pregnant.
I fell in love with a man and chose a gay lifestyle.

You planned for me to go to college to be your successor.
I moved to New York City and became a wanderer.
You saved up money all those years for my first home.
I lost it all in one night playing poker in Atlantic City.
You wrote your will and gave me everything when mother died.
I placed you in an old person's home until you passed away.

Now there is nothing left in this world
except memories of father, son, and mother nature.

 

 

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Last updated on 02/09/2011 03:44PM (EST)
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